Saturday, September 19

Distractions are good

I'm feeling a bit more settled this week -- or just doing a better job resigning myself to the fact that waiting isn't a bad thing. It's just a sucky thing.
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BigTex and I are heading off around noon to meet up with my folks and some friends. We're going to have lunch at a local brewery, then cheer on the home team at a football game (FEAR the ROO!), and wrap up the day firepit-side at our friends' house with pizza and more beer. And of course, we will be watching TEXAS tonight as they crush Texas Tech! Payback's a ... !

If you hadn't figured it out already--Fall means football, all the time, in our house!
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This might not make sense--but here it is anyway.

My friend and I were talking last night about the wait--and how everyone, naively, says early on in life that they're "not ready" to have kids yet. It can be they are still in school, or they just got a job, or they want to buy a house, or they haven't saved enough money. There are a ton of reasons to "not be ready" for a baby. Going through IF and now waiting to adopt, I've realized the difference between me and them is that now, I am so beyond ready to have a baby. I don't care if I was still in school, or had a new job, or no job, or a new house or an old apartment, or a lot of money or only a little money. Both BigTex and I are ready. And the part that is so interesting to me is that this change has occurred so gradually, so slowly, I didn't even realize it. Sure, we started TTC when we thought we were finally 'ready.' But did I even have a clue what it meant at that point? Hell no. When we did IVF #1, and then #2 and then #3, when we submitted our application to our agency--was I ready? Did I just think I was ready? Because I am convinced, today, as I write this, that NOW--in both mind and spirit--I am ready to be a parent. I know that BigTex is ready now, and I had my doubts at points along the way.

I've had people tell me that 'you can never be ready or prepared for a baby' because it just changes your life utterly and competely.

Oh yeah? Try spending a little time in the IF-corner or waiting as an adoptive parent. I think 'being ready' is an understatement.

(Hope this wasn't too confusing!)

2 comments:

BP said...

I totally agree! I passed a co-worker the other day, and she asked me how everything was going. I told her, "just waiting." In response, she said "well, each day is one day closer. At least you'll be ready!" No kidding, right? I liked that response though instead of "oh the wait must killing you...I don't think I could do that." I'm right there with you, Nicole.

BTW, Texas will not crush TECH (my alma mater) tonight!

Sprogblogger said...

You said it. So beyond ready, that I'm not sure I would have believed it of myself 10 years ago.