It's a no-sock day!

Actually, just not a "fun" sock day. We'll save those for tomorrow and Monday. I had BW done this morning to make sure my trigger was done correctly. I haven't gotten a call saying otherwise, so we are a go for an 8:30AM ER.

[Sidebar: what I have failed to mention is that I was informed yesterday afternoon that my trigger shot, you know the one that usually goes in your butt--or maybe sometimes your belly? Well, mine was to go in my arm. As in just like getting a flu shot or other vaccine. Apparently, this would ensure a better absorption of the hCG. Actually, she said it was probably due to my BMI, which I took as a big, motherf***ing insult since my weight has NEVER been an issue during treatment before or even been mentioned. I digress.]

I guess my ARM trigger shot was done correctly, but I'll tell you that I would take 10 shots in my butt before I'd do another one in my arm. It has basically been numb and completely useless all day today. I advise against this method of trigger shot. Protest has been logged.

--------------

A comment was posted today inquiring as to our status with the adoption journey. I have deliberately not written anything up to now because I wanted all my emotional energy to be channeled for this cycle. It still is, but to be fair, I will try to bring you up to speed.

I expect that we will receive our formal adoption class invitation in the mail by mid-March. When we accept this invite, we are committing to attend the two-day marathon session that will include orientation and some initial training. We are to send our homestudy fee and profile fee (our agency works with a graphic design firm to do all the profiles--that way, b-moms aren't just swayed by who made the prettiest book--which is one of the reasons we chose this agency) and in return we will get the start of our homestudy instructions and can begin the paper chase. If we choose to not commit, we can be bumped to the next group (like we did in January) or we can tell them we are no longer interested. Accepting this invite is like actually pushing the ball down the hill...it gets everything rolling.

Something that I haven't ever even mentioned here is that DH and I have begun to discuss the idea of embryo donation/adoption. Putting all the legal, ethical, & religious components over HERE in this box, we are looking at it from a purely logistical point-of-view right now. We know that adoption is higher on our list than using donor egg, simply because we would prefer to have a child that is both of ours through adoption. This does not, however, satisfy the curiosity and desire I have to know pregnancy. While I don't yearn to be pregnant (as in, it doesn't consume me--I really don't care where our children come from), as a woman I can't help but wonder what it would be like to be pregnant. And since I have never even had a positive pee stick, I really really don't know. So somewhere along the way, we crossed with the idea of using donated embryos or doing embryo adoption. I'll try and give a brief summary--but I'm still learning. The basics are that couples undergoing IVF may have more embryos than they are willing to actually transfer themselves (think Octomom, but without the crazy notion that 14 kids is a good idea). We all sign those forms stating what we want done with the remaining embryos--frozen indefinetely, destroyed, donate to research, or donate to another couple. This last one can be done anonymously, you can seek out your own recipient, or you can donate them to an embyro adoption program that will help you match with a recipient. It starts to get sticky here because the current laws are hodge-podge and "embryo adoption" doesn't really exist. I'll try and cover that at another time. But anyway...as a recipient, you can receive donated embryos from a clinic that has received them under complete anonimity or you too can seek out your own match with a couple looking for a known donation. Ultimately, this is the closed v. open concept in embryo donation.

We are considering this as a very viable option because, for us, it would fit several bills. First, Iwould have the chance to carry our child from as close to the start as you get without actually being there at conception. I could control diet, exercise, exposure to whatever--and get to experience pregnancy in all its glory. By giving birth, current law states that that child is ours as of that moment. There are no courts involved and there is no waiting for finalization. Once we deliver that child, I am the mother and my spouse is the father. We will have the original birth certificate. For us, we would prefer a known donation, for no other reason than the child and the questions he or she will certainly have later in life. We will always raise our child to know that he or she is "adopted" into our family. We will not "pretend" that he or she is our biological child. We will just say we adopted him or her as a snowbaby instead of as a live baby.

I lied...this wasn't short. But there is so much to consider. I will certainly continue to look into embryo donation/adoption AS WELL AS infant adoption once I know the outcome of this cycle. But right now, it's back to my zen place and dreams of my beautifully mature eggies making perfectly dividing embabies.

What do you guys think? Oh, and thanks to Bunny at bugaboo envy for choosing me for the Honest Scrap award. I'll get to that post while I'm resting up after my ET!