Does anyone even still read this thing?

I can't believe we are just two weeks from the end of 2010. It doesn't seem possible to be at the end of another 12 months. Wow.

This has been an absolutely amazing, wonderful, special year for us. And I have done a very poor job of sharing that here! To briefly cover all that you've missed, I'll try to summarize the high points. Overall, since late summer, life has literally just been burying us under a whole lot of nonsense. Most time consuming but least fun has been the very big changes at my job. While I am very grateful to have a job in this economy, the new company I work for has tested every fiber of my being. I'm not a fan of my new boss, my colleagues leave much to be desired and the work itself has become tedious and draining. I have been actively looking for a new job, interviewing and sending out resumes to some very good opportunities, but nothing has come of it so far. Each day I am trying to stay sane and every Monday I count down the days (wait, hours) until Friday. BigTex has been a great support--he too recognizes that I'm not happy with my situation. It is so nice to have his ear at the end of the day and to know that we are in this together. Okay, enough about my crappy job.

In much happier news, our lives have been very full of Tulip as she continues to grow into this darling little person that I still can't believe has been placed with us forever. On September 16, we drove to our state capital and with our wonderful family and great friends by our sides, we told the Court what this little girl means to us and we committed to loving her unconditionally for her whole life. We received our Final Decree of Adoption and just last week, we received her amended birth certificate listing BigTex and I as her parents. It is surreal to think that this is really F-O-R-E-V-E-R. Humbling and amazing all at the same time.

We were able to spend time with Tulip's first parents in September and again last week--nothing makes me more proud than seeing them with her. Proud of them and proud of us for doing what really is very difficult. Getting together would seem like it might re-open the wounds of loss and grief and guilt that each of us has gone through this past year; but when we are together, it actually feels like it might be healing. Our Tulip (all of ours) is a direct reflection of love and commitment. She has his eyes and her smile, and I see them in her every single day. We are honored to have them in our lives for Tulip. We will continue to visit as time moves on; hopefully it will blossom into a celebration of love and family and grace and joy. That is my wish, anyway.

In October we traveled to Texas to see family and friends--and of course to introduce Tulip to the land of BigTex. It was so awesome to be able to share our lovely daughter with those who have supported us and prayed for us for so long. And Tulip actually did very well on the 3 hour plane ride both ways. She loved being outside despite the record 90+ degree weather and even the time change wasn't too difficult to adjust to. We can't wait to go back in the spring!

Well, there is a lot more but it will have to wait another day. Time to venture out in this snowstorm to do my super-fun job! Haha.